Monthly Archives: October 2013

your kind of music

You say you will never fall in love again, that you had enough share of rough patches on your heart to hold it from exploding. You even fake promises to yourself ( yourself is the only one you can make promises to when you know your best friend will not believe the same promises that you break overtimes). Alrite,let us not be that rude on oneself, you keep that promise, but for how long? Say seven months? Or may be a year!
Ta Da! Then guess what happens after a year. You meet a guy, just be friends (I thought the line “a guy n a girl can never be JUST friends “ was super lame but I guess it stays lame only till one of the heart starts beating in another rhythm… then you know how that story continues).Sooner or later you will notice the change in rhythm of the heart beat, the only question will be if it is you kind of music or not. Lucky if you love lazy Jazz and his heart beats in tunes of Jazz as well; but a tragedy if his heart starts singing cozy country songs.


My heart is a total mess! It wanders around recklessly, not wanting to be tamed. It drinks and drives around city owned by heartless hearts, bumps into one mischievous bad black heart. You know the rest… it falls 5.5 feet under the ground. Why 5.5 feet you ask? If you must know, better would be if it fell half more feet down; my heart would rest in peace then. But No! it dint, it got stuck at 5.5, suffocating, wanting to breathe love-filled-air and live!

in the air

I will speak to you in whispers so that no one can hear me talk to you.I will scribble your name in the air so that no one can see it. I want to keep you a secret. My only secret!

baking hearts!!!

Never ever ever had I ever thought that my heart would possess tongue of its own.No such thing had I imagined, not even in my dream that my heart would be swarmed with zillions of taste buds. Irrationally generous or generously irrational was I to serve it a huge slice of my love that I baked for you. Every day I started, I started to bake, bake my love for you to feed my starving heart. The sugary syrupy savory taste of that love got jammed up on those stubborn tiny taste buds.

Soon they realized that smoky feeling when I was baking,  slowly killing me instead of healing. Then my heart refused to taste it, asking me to stop it. Many days passed by when my heart kept on starving .Hard for my mind it was to see my poor heart dying. Then it suggested to make some warm memories with chunks of laughter and happiness. So, I did! Made warm creamy memories, dropped big chunks of laughter and happiness ; filled the spoon full and slowly let my heart sip it.

rainbow of emotions



Those shrill cries…

Yes! Those shrill cries that my eyes shout

When they witness themselves bleeding tears

When they hear nothing but empty lifeless heartbeats

Pounding and thumping like they are trying to escape from the void


Lips make the hissing noise

Eyes keep quiet.

Only sheer silence!

Eyes get dumb, a pair of palms covering them.

Gust of wind clutches the sweet warm scent

That familiar scent pinches the heart

Heart dances pulsating with love


Lo! Eyes smile…

  tear glistening  in the dark !!!

shy n’ nervous

tumblr_mi6ca5Dfhy1rnb624o1_500Shy were those lips,

When they smiled listening to me blabber endlessly.

Nervous and happy were those eyes,

When they were caught by my sight!


I have one big crazy family (trust me, when I say crazy ,I really mean it).In this crazily insane family of twisted people(twisted at many places) I always kept my eldest aunt out of the list (not saying she is not part of my family but that I prefer not calling her crazy). I am writing this blog just to tell you a short story of my aunt,whom I had thought to be the most sojhi (innocent) soul of the family but the story my other aunts shared took me by surprise. Well I guess the saying “napatyauney khola le bagaucha” is super true.

We have to get into time travelling machine and travel may be some 50 years back, when my aunt was just in her teens. Before beginning the story, let me give you a brief intro about her; she is real quite and gentle ,really sweet natured lady and
“atti nai sojhi”. Whenever I asked her how she met Uncle (her husband), she used to just give us a bright smile and nothing more. But oneday I insisted my other aunts to spill out the mystery about her smile.

As my other aunt says,”Back in those days, we had our own specific thaals(plates) for dinner.Didi (my eldest aunt) had golden(not really gold) thaal which she never shared with us.But one night while serving dinner she says to us-“From today on you can have this thaal.” We were very happy to get to eat in that particular thaal. After dinner all of us went to sleep. Next day early morning, our mom woke us up and shouted at us. What really had happened was, Didi had eloped with her lover.That took all of us by surprise.One of the neighbour had warned mom earlier about her being in affair  but like us mom was pretty sure about her daughter and refused to believe the neighbours’ word.”

Hearing this we were super dooper surprised. It was hard for us to believe that my sojhi aunt would elope and too hard to believe my uber sojho uncle would be so brave to make their love story happen. Seeing them together makes me want to have their type of love. Hope I as well get some brave hearted man to swipe me off my feet and carry me away. Won’t it be romantic? 😛


After years and years of negligence, today I finally looked down at the concrete forest from the caged balcony of Dharahara. What really happened was, we were on the way to Khichapokhari and like any other day I made the same comment about Dharahara – “jum Dharahara chadau aja”.  Also i added another line – “if the ticket price is Fifty rupees, I will pay for you both.”

The big sign board where it was painted – “General ticket price Rs.50 only” made the F word come out of my mouth. There was no way they were going to let me go, and not make me pay for the tickets. So, we walked in the premise and I was surprised to see the beautiful garden (though the area was small); never had my poor mind imagined that within the core of all the hustles, loud ear numbing noises and parade of vehicles, there would be such a beautiful piece of serenity.

We marched inside the not-so-tall coiled steps of Dharahara, “Step number 1…. Stape no 188 …” “kripaya bhitta ma fohor nagaridinu hola” “kripaya paan, khaini yaha naphyalnu hola” these words were painted on the inner walls. It is a real tragedy to think how stupid and disconcerned visitors are that they have to be reminded not to do a simple task that they should feel ashamed on acting.

Pushing these concerns aside for a bit, let me tell you how I felt after I reached  the top of the world (NOT)… Ok! how I felt when I reached the top of Dharahara. I knew what I was signing for when I agreed to climb, I was welcoming whole session full of nagging from my friend and my sister about how I am afraid of height. When I stepped on the balcony (I guess that is what it is called), I was literally glued to the walls, I didn’t let air pass through the gaps of my back and walls of Dharahara. It reminded me of a scene from “Mr.Bean”, where he struggles to jump down from the board at the top in swimming pool.

I looked through the barred cage, the city looked beautiful (even the clusters of buildings simply looked beautiful). Then my friend goes “kathmandu sahara… herda lagcha rahara” (a dialogue from movie LOOT). If you know me well, you must know how I am obsessive of taking pictures of everything and every moment. Well, I had to take pictures but I was scared would drop the phone. Lucky me, there were my two photographers, who happen to be my walking ATM as well( sorry guys :P).kj

I almost forgot to mention there is Shiva mandir at the top of Dharahara, about which I have no more information. Hopefully, I will find out more about that pretty soon. Actually, I have no real information on Dharahara itself as well except that it was built by Bhimsen Thapa and there were two Dharaharas standing side by side in Sundhara. I hope I got the info right.

Well, to sum it all up, I had quite a experience climbing Dharahara but  I wish I hadn’t climbed it yet cause it didn’t meet my expectation. When I used to look at the giant white cylinder, I always wondered how it would feel to reach at the top and how different would city look from above. And now that I have been there, I don’t feel so hyped.